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It’s 2:57 AM, and I’m on the plane home from Cape Town, South Africa, after spending three weeks working with Early Childhood Development Centers (ECDs), a children’s sports program, and a food security non-profit organization. I’ve just received a text from someone close to me (thank God for airplane WiFi). It reads: “It seems like the South Africa experience was unbelievable and life-changing.”

Throughout the trip, I’ve posted many pictures and received countless similar texts from family and friends. They said, “Wow, looks amazing!” and I replied, “Yes!! It’s great. Can’t wait to tell you about it!” In doing so, I push away my reflections, the things I’ve learned, and new principles I intend to carry forward into the time I have left at Duke and beyond. But now I’m on the plane, painfully aware that these three weeks have ended, unable to find anything to busy myself with for the remaining seven hours of this flight, and all of the experiences are coming back to me all at once. I’m trying to sort through this jumbled mess of memories and lessons flying around my head right now, thinking of what to tell my friends when they ask about my favorite parts – will a pre-planned script of experiences help me inform everyone faster? How will I explain the real impact of the trip on me to someone who wasn’t there to experience it? I don’t know where to begin with my responses… but I’m excited to get into it.

But now I’m on the plane, painfully aware that these three weeks have ended, unable to find anything to busy myself with for the remaining seven hours of this flight, and all of the experiences are coming back to me all at once.

I’m excited to see my best friend and tell her how, on my birthday, servers at the Kirstenbosch Botanical Gardens played the drums and sang for me, taking great care and time to show me that they care about me on my special day. She’s going to love hearing about how I got up on the stage at Mojo Market that night with all five others there who shared my birthday as we screeched Sweet Caroline by Neil Diamond while my eleven fellow program participants, two program leaders, and our bus driver clapped on eagerly from the crowd. The love I developed for all those people in such a short period is unbelievable.

I’m excited to see my parents and tell them about that memorable day in an ECD when I drew many pictures and labeled them – penguin, cat, house, etc. They’ll be so excited to hear about the little girl who loved the castle I drew for her so much that soon, most of the little girls asked for castles on their sheets of paper. They’ll be proud of me for bringing the children confidence through some new – somewhat questionable – dance moves. They’ll smile when they hear about the stories we read for them about all sorts of things and how I had their unwavering attention as I read to them about “Big Mouse and Little Mouse.” They’ll never be able to see how the children’s faces lit up as we arrived in the mornings, but if my storytelling can convey even half of the emotions of those experiences, then they’ll know I had a great time.

I’m excited to see my grandad because I know he will laugh when he hears about one of my favorite days when we worked with Ladles of Love. He’ll find it funny that we took so much pleasure in decanting oats into smaller bags, ready to be sent off to the very ECDs we were working with, putting food in the mouths of children that same day. I think he’ll be glad that my muscles have finally done something meaningful. Holding huge buckets of jam and peanut butter, carrying big bags of oats, and moving whatever we were asked to, there was nothing we wouldn’t have done in that warehouse to help. We knew just how much the children in the ECDs depended on the provisions of Ladles of Love and used our high-performance sports experience to streamline our processes, speed up work, and encourage each other to turn food out of the door as quickly as it came in. My grandad will be so pleased to hear that the qualities I have developed as a student-athlete at Duke have a purpose outside of a sporting context. I’m excited to be given more opportunities to show how efficient a Duke student-athlete can be. I’m sure my fellow program participants will back me up on that.

Teammates, family members, and loved ones: so many people will hear about this trip, so I’m so grateful that I have such good experiences to share with them. But amongst the happy things we can be proud of are the more hard-hitting moments that had the biggest impact on me. The things we saw opened my eyes and taught me things that I don’t think I could ever have learned second-hand. There were things I needed to see with my own two eyes.

Teammates, family members, and loved ones: so many people will hear about this trip, so I’m so grateful that I have such good experiences to share with them. But amongst the happy things we can be proud of are the more hard-hitting moments that had the biggest impact on me. The things we saw opened my eyes and taught me things that I don’t think I could ever have learned second-hand. There were things I needed to see with my own two eyes.

On one of our first days, we toured Langa, the township where we worked during our program. I was struck by the poor condition of the housing – tin roofs and doors that didn’t fit meant that the residents were perpetually cold and wet. Many children showed up to the sports camp each day with runny noses, in the same outfit they’d been wearing the day before. When we handed out disposable plastic ponchos for an event, children asked for a second and third one. What we would consider necessities in the US, the children in Langa did not have. But they turned up daily with a smile, listening ears, and the utmost respect for us volunteers because they took every opportunity they had. It reminded me so much of the “We Get To” culture within our rowing team and how we do things because we can. The children in Langa will never give up an opportunity. I will remember their enthusiasm and gratitude next time I’m offered an opportunity that I’m too lazy to take up because there are people who have a lot less than me who would jump at the chance.

Additionally, the experience has made me reflect on how materialistic I have become. I’m laughing now at how concerned I was that I’d only brought seven pairs of leggings, one pair of jeans, three hoodies, and “only” five sets of gym wear. The clothes I brought on a three-week trip were more than any of these children owned.  I will do something about the privilege I have now. I will think twice before I follow silly micro-trends and invest in clothes that will last a lifetime.

I have seen many things that will influence how I act going forward. That’s not to say I am transformed; I’m still the same Erin who might occasionally complain about having to write a ten-page paper, but I’m going to check my privilege more often, be more grateful for what I have, and find ways to give back to those in the local community as there are always people who could use an extra hand. And as Ladles of Love taught us, “Sometimes the best thing you can give up is your time.”

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